Should you Hook Up at Work? Relationship Tips for a Happy Workplace



Posted: Wednesday, July 16, 2008

by
Healing Couch, Inc.

Have you ever felt a personal interest in someone at work? Have you wondered if it is ok to date a coworker? Have you ever crossed the line and dated someone at your office or know someone else who did? Then this article could be for you!

Most companies have strict policies about work relationships, and support employees maintaining professional relationships that do not include dating or sexual relations because of legal reasons and because of potential loss of productivity or employees if there is an ugly breakup or domestic situation!

Here are some relationship tips to keep in mind if you want to enjoy your work relationships, stay out of trouble at work, and also have a great social life.

5 Things to avoid:

  • Avoid "Happy Hour Hookups". Coworkers sometimes go out for drinks together after work. While it is ok to socialize, some people have one-too many drinks and end up going home with someone from work. This is not a good idea, and can definitely cost you later. Things can become uncomfortable and complicated for either or both of you when you face each other in the office.


  • Avoid the "Office Gossip Mill". Dating coworkers, bosses or people who report to you tends to have a major downside. You can risk your job, your career, legal situations and unpleasantness at work. The rumors from the gossip mill alone are enough to ruin your job or your credibility at work. If you do genuinely meet the love of your life at work, one of you may want to consider transferring if your company prohibits on site partnerships.


  • Avoid the temptation of spreading rumors or news about others, who is dating who, or who is sleeping with whom. People feed on this type of information. It may be tempting to share juicy tidbits about coworkers, but it's not nice, and it makes you seem petty. If you are building teams or trying for a promotion, it may be a deal-breaker. Stick to discussing TV drama; it's a harmless diversion.


  • Avoid making your coworkers into sexual objects, even behind their backs. This can create an uncomfortable atmosphere, and can diminish that person's chances to be respected for their talents and not their looks or sex appeal. People can sense when others are ogling them, so keep it professional.


  • Avoid flirting making sexual comments or jokes with coworkers. You can be sued for harassment. Plus, it makes others uncomfortable and is not polite. If others flirt or make comments to you, then ask them to stop. If they don't stop, you can report them to a supervisor or human resources.


    • 5 Things to do:

  • Do socialize appropriately. Get involved in fundraisers and community events. A charity event or project you get involved with through work is a great way to get to know your coworkers while helping a good cause in the community. It's great to be social with people you work with.


  • Be clear about your boundaries. Remember that what you do today will be remembered tomorrow and the next day. Stick to your own personal limits about what you will and won't participate in. Express your limits to others as needed. Don't turn your work friendships into group therapy.


  • Choose your work friends wisely. Get to know people over time rather than jumping in with the "crowd" at work. Remember, you are being paid to do a job at your workplace, so don't socialize excessively during work hours. Be sure that the quality of the friendships you develop reflects your professional goals and values.


  • Use proper channels of communication: Be aware of your company's protocol about e-mail, hallway conversations, and be careful not to breech any privacy laws or rules that compromise you, your employer, or your clients in any way. Focus on being positive in your conversations with others, and you can certainly be seen as the positive problem-solver who gets things done.


  • Do date and go out, but find people other than those you work with. Look for clubs or activities to join in your community based on your interests or those you would like to develop. That way you can be happier and more effective at work and at play.


    • Even though it is sometimes tempting, it is probably best in almost every case to stay professional at the office and to find your romance somewhere else. I hope that these success tips are helpful to you in your work and your personal life. For additional articles on dating and relationships, or to sign up for singles, relationship or sexuality coaching, visit our website at www.healingcouch.com.

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